Public Apology: If doing the right thing was easy everyone would be doing it!

Throughout the last few days (since my blog post on the CC meeting), I’ve taken the opportunity to reflect upon my motivation for posting that particular blog post–I was frustrated.  Being frustrated isn’t always a bad thing, but how we deal with it can be. (I’m speaking to myself in this case) I often heard the saying “Be angry, but sin not,”, and for the life of me it took me years to figure this one out and it still looks like I don’t always follow my own advice and I don’t always learn from the mistakes of others.  (Read Jono’s Art of Community, you’ll see why I said that.)

In this blog post I didn’t do two things and not doing the following really caused me to see errors in how I handled this whole thing.

1. Never Blog when you are frustrated, angry, hurt, etc. Sure you can write it up, sit on it for 24-48 hours, then review it and see if your points still hold true.

2. Never make it personal. If it leans that way, wait, review it, and if you are still upset, just reach out and talk to that person rather than blog about it.

Sadly I did neither of these things.  I am guilty of jumping in on the bandwagon of frustration and fanning those flames of discourse rather than helping find a solution. This was not my finest hour.

Having said that, do I think there are areas in the community that can be improved, of course I do, and so does Jono as you can see by his recent blog pasts and as he puts it his “mini-obsession” with finding solutions. (Welcome Feedback, Keep the Feedback Train Rolling, Onwards and Upwards, Weekly Canonical Community Team Meetings Now on IRC, and New Community Council) As I tweeted after seeing Jono’s comment to my blog, I never doubted his dedication nor is commitment to finding a solution.

Jono recently sent out a survey, to find out more about the overall pulse and satisfaction in the community.  I haven’t seen the results yet, but here is what I predict this survey is going to show – that there is a vocal minority that is frustrated and upset; however, the majority of the Ubuntu Members are content and happy with the Community, Canonical and their involvement in the project.

Why did I say all that?  I was leading up to this – when you make a very public mistake in the way you handle things, which I believe I did,  I believe the responsible thing to do is to make a very public apology as well.  In other words, I screwed up with my earlier post, I can’t unring the bell, but I can change the conversation going forward.  I can lead by example, I can be part of the solution, and when I am wrong I can apologize. (Which I am not always good at, and at times make things worse by trying to do so, but here goes.)

Dear Jono,

Let me begin with, “I’m sorry.”

I’m sorry for blogging without thinking my actions through.  I can see that by doing so my behavior and attitude was hurtful and totally unnecessary. You did not deserve to be on the receiving end of my actions.

It was not my intention to create such an awkward and embarrassing situation for you, your team, Canonical, nor the Ubuntu Community.

If there was any good that came out of this unfortunate experience, it is that I have grown and learned alternative approaches to these situations.

As you know, I am normally not like this. While I am not excusing myself from my unprofessional actions, I believe I acted the way I did because of my own frustration with not understanding the whole situation.

I hope that we can move past this awkward situation I created and that no permanent harm was caused to our friendship nor our working relationship.

with sincerest apologies,

Amber

It’s not always easy to admit when I am wrong, it is; however, necessary and the right thing to do.

I am looking forward being on the Ubuntu Community Council and working with Jono, and other leaders in the community to make the 12.04 cycle one of the best yet; however, 11.10 going to be hard to top.

Jono you have an amazing team of people who work for you, Jorge Castro, Daniel Holbach, David Planella, Ahmed Kamal, and Eric Ward.  I appreciate what you as a team do as part of your jobs on the Canonical Community Team and I appreciate all you do in, with and for the Ubuntu Community.   I also appreciate Canonical’s support of the community with things like CD’s, conference packs, banners, table covers and more.  I also appreciate that we as a community are empowered to, as Jorge Castro says, “To just do Stuff!”  Thank you!